Have you ever opened your mouth and something really stupid came out? We all have. When we have guests at our church, our goal is to make them feel welcome. Making guests feel welcome is one of the most important factors in people deciding to return to your church. Here are some safe sayings to help your guests feel special and not stupid.
“HAVE WE MET?” is way better than “are you new?” or ”you must be new!” We start with “have we met” it focuses the conversation on the relationship. When you go with “are you new” it focuses the attention on the guest and not in a good way. Most visitors today want to blend in and hide on their first few visits. Allowing people to blend in and hide is not rude, it’s helpful. One more benefit to “have we met” is the larger your church gets, the more you will introduce yourself to people who are not new. I once heard someone introduce themselves to someone who had attended the church for 30 plus years and they asked, “Is this your first Sunday?” The member replied, “honey, I’ve been here longer than anyone else.” The well intentioned host apologized and to be fair, the member could have been more gracious. This conversation convinced me that there must be a better way to say hello. This leads to another great question, “HOW LONG HAVE YOU ATTENDED HERE?” instead of “are you new?”
“DO YOU LIVE AROUND HERE?” If you go with the standard, “Hi. My name is X” conversation starter, you will probably get a name and a handshake. Let me interject here how important eye contact is. Looking people in the eyes communicates you really are interested in them. If they have children, bend down to their level and look them in the eye too. When we honor kids, we honor Christ who loves kids and wants them to come to Him freely. When we honor kids, we honor their parents as well. Back to the conversation. If you add the “have we met” you will get a second conversational interchange. Adding one last item, the “do you live around here” question, not only will this extend the conversation, it gives you a really valuable piece of information. If your guests do not live around you, you can alert the church to start the out of town guests protocol. If your guests mention they do live around here you will know they are a potential return guest. Asking how long they have lived in the area can also give you another valuable piece of information. If they have lived here years, they may have several reasons for attending your church. If they just moved into town, you know exactly why they are at your church.
Whatever the conversation is, it needs to be authentic. While these tips may helpful to you if you are not great at talking with church visitors, the most valuable thing you can do is to be genuinely interested in them. Follow your instincts and do your best to share your love God has given you. Last, don’t over talk the conversation. If your guests are trying to hide, they probably don’t want a 10 minute conversation. You will also want to leave room for other members to address your guests.
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